THE GOOD OIL
ROUND 9 REVIEW
Brokeback Mountain Cowgirls 28 flog Bullgrubs 12
Seriously…WTF is happening at the Doggies??? Their once proud home at the Kennel is now turning into the home of the easy beats!!! I thought that the Bullgrubs might turn things around and put the Cowgirls to the sword and that was looking the goods when the Dogs scored first. When Mullet Man scored for the Cowgirls, I figured that would get the home side to switch on but apparently not. To be fair, they did manage to tie things up and almost took the lead back but choked like $2 hookers as the Cowgirls kicked away for an easy win. Best the Puppies unf*ck themselves real quick…
Woolfie’s Washouts 28 destroy Dodgy Mexicans 10
These last few weeks I have been saying that we know the Storm are going to turn things around and that it was only a matter of when. Well I thought this game was their when. Nope. I have no idea what is going on down there in Mexico but I do know I would hate to be in that dressing room!!! The Phins were hosting and almost drew first blood but were unlucky not to score. The visitors scored first and I was thinking that this might be the catalyst they need but some desperate Phins defence kept them out. I thought my tip was safe when Melbourne went to 10-0 but that was all she wrote. The Dolphins then went into overdrive and proceeded to tear the Storm apart. Even when the Hammer went to the bin, the points kept on flowing thanks to some absolutely deplorable Melbourne defence…
Faiders 28 down Meter Maids 12
I dead-set must have been drinking bong water when I put my tips in this week because for some inexplicable reason I tipped the Titans to topple the Faiders. Now in my defence, neither side has been setting the Rugby League world alight but I had a feeling that the Meter Maids might be able to cause a bit of a boil over. The writing was on the wall when the Faiders scored first but when presented with the perfect opportunity to square up the ledger, the Titans dropped the ball cold with the line wide open. The Faiders went to a 16-0 lead and were never headed as mistake after mistake culled any chance of the Meter Maids to stage anything that resembled an upset. The closest the Titans could get was within 10 which did not help my tips at all…
Sheep Shaggers 36 pump Trouser Snakes 14
…and yet another tip where I must have been feeling the effects of the bong water because I amazingly picked the Trouser Snakes to upset the Shaggers at Wankbank Stadium but noooooo. It only took 5 mins for the Eels to open the scoring but some wafer thin goal line defence saw them equalise. From there, it was all the Warriors. They dominated the Eels in all aspects and had a 16-6 lead at the break. It should have been about 28-6 but some old habits of the Kiwis crept into their game. After oranges Parramatta showed a flash of brilliance to peg one back but a couple of intercept tries coupled with arsepiss defence from the Eels saw the Warriors walk away comfortable winners…
Headless Chooks 38 pip Mighty Broncos 24
The injury riddled Broncs were not supposed to get within a bull’s roar of the Chooks in this clash and I will be honest, at 30-0 down it looked like my beloved Pony’s injuries had finally caught up with them. I will give credit where it is due. The Rorters were on fire. They were relentless in their attack and their defence was rock solid…in the first half. Tobasco Sauce was on fire and you would have to think that he is in line for an Origin callup this year??? That said, come the second half the Broncos rallied and when Reece sliced through and then Willison stepped Teddy like he wasn’t there, a comeback was on the cards. This was something special as the Chooks had a pucker factor of 90, especially when Patty Carrigan scored. Unfortunately when Staggs had a brain snap and got marched for the last 10 minutes, it was only a matter of time before the Roosters capitalised…
Novocastrations 42 whoop Rusty’s Roadkill 38
Obviously defence went right out the window in this one with a massive 80 points being scored!!! The Novocastrations were hosting and were on fire as they tore the Bunnies apart. Newcastle fans would have been sitting there thinking “Where the hell has this been???” as the home side went out to a 22-0 lead before the Rabbits scored. Ponga terrorised them again but the Rabbits wouldn’t say die. At 30-16 it was looking ominous for the visitors but they managed to get it back to within 4 points before it was a tit for tat affair. When the Rabbitohs hit the front at 38-36, I thought the Knights were shot but once again they clawed back the last try to break the red and green hearts…
Peptide Pals 52 destroy Kitty Kats 10
What was a promising start to the season for the Kitty Kats suddenly turned into a bit of a horror story in this game. With 5 wins under their belt so far this season, I was expecting a nice close contest and when they took a 10-6 lead I was mistakenly under the belief that this would be anyone’s game. How wrong I was. After 20 minutes it seemed like the Tigers had shut up shop as they had no answer to the Sharkies onslaught. There was some pretty deplorable efforts from the Tigers as the Cronulla players made them look pedestrian at best. You could call it a comedy of errors but there would be no Tigers fans laughing at this result…
Boganville Panfers 18 rob Water Budgies 16
The Panfers have definitely lost their air of invincibility though they seem to be doing just enough to get the job done. It was Manly though who scored the first meat pie before Penriff managed to tie things up. The home side hit the front and took a 6 point lead into the break but that was short lived after the Budgies levelled. With 25 to go the visitors hit the front and they kept peppering the Riff’s line but they managed to stave off any chance that. A late try to the Choccy Soldiers and what do you know…they escape with the two points…
ROUND 10 PREVIEW
Woolfie’s Washouts vs Bullgrubs
Tough one right off the bat as both sides have not shown any consistency at all. Now on paper the smart money would be on the Bullgrubs but as we saw last week in their capitulation to the Cowgirls, they are far from the team they should be. As for the Phins, they have won only one out of their last 4 games and although it was against the Dodgy Mexicans, it is not as though the Storm are the powerhouse they were last season. Definitely one of those games which will be decided by the flip of a coin but I am going to err on the side of caution and put my hard earned on the Phins…
Phins by 6
Headless chooks vs Meter Maids
I think Uncle Nick will be able to save a bit of coin this week as he shouldn’t need to dish out the brown paper bags. The Chooks were on fire against the Broncos last week and if they come out of the gates playing like that again, I think that the game will be over in the first half as the Meter Maids are not known for their defensive prowess!!! The worst thing for the Titans is that they are playing south of the border, albeit in Gosford but still down in enemy territory. If they are not careful, this could turn into a cricket score, especially when guys like Tobasco Sauce are hunting for a sky blue jersey…
Uncle Nick by 30
Brokeback Mountain Cowgirls vs Trouser Snakes
To quote one of my long suffering Parramatta supporting mates after last week’s loss “F*ck…we are shit”. Yes…yes you are shit and this week is not going to get any better. The Westy rabble make the trek up to North Queensland and face the sister-lovin hillbillies at Hayseed Stadium which is going to be a tough ask for them. With only three wins under their belt this year and some very heavy losses thrown in the mix, it is hard to see what rabbit the Eels can pull from their hat to try and get the 2 points. As much as I hate to say it, I would have to back the home side in this one and pretty comfortably as well…
Hillbillies by 18
Drag Queens vs Novocastrations
Knights…because how can you possibly back a team who can’t win a bloody chook raffle…
Knights by 10
Rusty’s Roadkill vs Peptide Pals
This will be an interesting matchup with the Bunnies having the home ground advantage but also coming off a high scoring loss against the Novocastrations. The Peptide Pals on the other hand are still riding high (probably literally) after giving the Kitty Kats a good, old fashioned gut kicking. I am really hoping that Latrine plays well because I think he needs another Origin call-up…after all, he is Queensland’s best player!!! The Rabbits are short priced favourites and I think that they will get the job done. I am not taking too much away from that win that the Sharks had against the Tigers last round as their opposition was nothing short of deplorable. Hell, I could have bagged a hat trick of meat pies…
Bunnies by 14
Water Budgies vs Mighty Broncos
The Broncs were gallant in defeat in their match against the Cocks last week but in saying that, Manly put up a good fight against the Riff in Gosford. The worst thing for the visitors is that they have added Mariner and Reynolds to their growing injury toll so the lads will have to dig deep. What doesn’t help the Broncos is that Sutton is the referee. Talk about being up against it…but then again, they were up against it last year and look how they went!!! This will be a tight first half and if the slow-starting Broncos can defend like they have been, I can see them kick away in the second half…
Broncos by 8
Dodgy Mexicans vs Kitty Kats
Now normally I would be tipping the Mexicans by about 50 but after their recent performances, I wouldn’t be surprised if the Tigers ventured south of the border and returned with 2 points in their kit bag. I know I have been saying it for a few weeks but SURELY Melbourne have to click??? Don’t forget that the Riff were coming last nearly halfway through the season last year and ended up missing the Grand Final thanks to an awesome Broncos performance. Bellyache will be at the end of his tether and I am pretty sure that he will be giving certain members of the team their ‘last chance’ to perform. Couple that with the fact that Jerome I-am-a-Tiger-for-life has now signed with the PNG side which will have ramifications on the Kitty Kats and I can see Melbourne having their first win in a long, long time…
SURELY Storm by 16
Faiders vs Boganville Panfers
The last game to round out the week is the ladder leading Panfers versus the 13th place Faiders. The Has Been Machine bounced back after their flogging at the hands of the Tigers to down the Meter Maids up there in God’s country. This week they are hosting the Riff who scraped home against the Water Budgies last round. I did say that the Choccy Soldiers have lost their air of invincibility and normally the Faiders in Canberra would be a daunting task, but I still think that the WRX driving crowd will be heading home with a kebab in their hand and a smile on their dial…
Riff by 10
Sheep Shaggers are bi
